So I came home from work tonight, after a long day, bad headache, food shopping. I put the food away. Went in the basement to get my clothes out of the dryer from the night before. At the bottom of the steps, I stopped and stared at the heater. I had to get closer. What did I see? That's right, a dead squirrel. I looked at it for a good 2 minutes before screaming up to my Mom to come down the basement. She came down, screamed, stared and ran away. It was hilarious. So we decided there was no way around it, no men around, we had to get rid of it ourselves. I got a plastic bag from swiss farms and a broom. Right before we did it, my Mom told me to get my camera and take a picture for Josh. So we had a photo shoot with the dead squirrel. Even holding up a tea cooler bottle to demonstrate the size. I held one end of the bag, she held the other and we brushed the dead animal into the bag, as that happened, something rolled off. I thought it was his head. I screamed, cried in hysterical laughter and almost peed. Turns out it was a dead bird. WTF. I guess the squirrel caught him outside? Who knows. Just adding to the freaking weirdness. It felt like a David Lynch movie. After I stopped laughing I took the dead duo to the sewer. I know, gross, but what the hell was I supposed to do? Don't answer that. Laugh with me. I know my Dad is probably up in Heaven with my Grandfather pissing himself laughing at us. That if anything, makes me very happy. Enjoy the flics.
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4 weeks ago